I started to learn Dutch not long after meeting An, the main purpose being able to take part in discussions and to be able to survive when out and about. Now considering that I have been learning on and off for around almost 8 years, you would think I would be reasonably proficient. I have to say that I am not as swept up as I would like to be and part of that is down to not dedicating time to learning and then putting it into use.
I started off by learning the sounds of the various combinations of letters such as ij and ei. Now I won't go into detail because it would put you off but communication is all about saying the right thing and it sounding correct, the order of the words is not necessarily important. It is nice but it is icing on the cake so to speak. An speaks very good English, but if I was to stop and correct the grammar of what she is saying then we would not get very far, the key point is that I know what she means even if it is a bit jumbled at times.
Confidence is also very important. A friend of mine said to me that I should say whatever I want in Dutch and then revert to English to fill the gaps, a kind of hybrid. At first, when I was learning, I only wanted to say things if they were correct and therefore I would not try, that phase has passed.
Another thing, which takes a bit of getting used to is to be in a completely alien environment where everyone is talking to each other and you cannot understand either because of the speed of speech or the words they are using. I was at a private party one evening and two blokes came up to me and said something which was clearly very amusing to them but which I did not understand at all. I noticed that some of the other guests looked uncomfortable and An was not around to translate. The thing is, there was no impact on me whatsoever, what I did understand is that they were both extremely rude and that was from body language alone. Now this really reinforced what most people in that situation must think and that is, well because I don't understand they must be talking about me and not knowing is bothering me. Even though An's English is very good I have noticed that she feels quite isolated when in similar situations England. This phase also passes, people are not necessarily talking about you because you cannot understand what they are saying. It is very tiring to concentrate for so long and I have not even begun to deal with accents!
An has asked me if I can pick out the differences in accents but I am afraid that I can only distinguish between Flemish and Dutch speakers, it sounds like the latter is drowning when they speak! In fact my view on the difference is that Flemish is more refined and softly spoken. I have been told that I have an no Dutch accent, which is nice but then people expect you to be fluent so it can be a bit of a disadvantage. The accent I put down to learning the sounds of the combinations of letters at the start.
People say that Dutch must be such a difficult language to learn, I suppose the answer to that is no language is that difficult it is just that you reach your limits rather quicker and find yourself searching for the right words. I hit the buffers more often than I would like. I did go through a phase of learning one to one with a teacher from Limburg, my father-in-law laughed when I told him, he told me that their accent was one of the stranger ones! Anyway, when learning grammar from my Limburg teacher, it became obvious how much I took English for granted. We have more or less the same rules but my God, try explaining them! I tended to learn favourite sayings and therefore stick to what I knew. I worked through the entire book and my teacher was quite pleased, although I think her expectations of my progress did not reflect reality.
I have had to learn by experience and so when we had the roof put on our house I learnt the language associated with this building project, the same could be said for the windows, getting work done on the car and, of course, ordering beer and food in cafes.
An does not speak much Dutch when talking to me and so I am missing out a bit here, but really this is a matter of convenience and speed. It would take too long to get things done. One of the things, and I am getting better, is learning the subtle differences between different words for example vlees and fles, the first is meat and the second is a bottle. The v and f are similar sounding, however, the double e is a longer sound and the emphasis is slightly different. It is also worth pointing out that the letter e sounds like the a in Jay not e as it meet. You also have to be careful when you spell out words as the i in Dutch sounds like e in English! You do get over these when people keep passing you a plate of meat instead of a bottle of water! A lot of it is just saying it with confidence. Now, a word of warning, the subtle wordplay of English does not really work even if you are chatting to people whose English is excellent. The same must apply in reverse and the amount of times when I have been told a joke and just looked blankly must have been a bit off-putting. Combine that with my poor hearing and it can be a challenge.
One evening An and I were watching a documentary on the Titanic and at that particular moment it was concerning the distress signal. They were explaining that it used to be CQD, referred to as Come Quickly Distress, but that they had recently introduced the signal SOS, Save Our Souls. An asked me what SOS meant and naturally I replied Save Our Souls. She was almost shocked and said that it could not possibly mean that, so I repeated it and said no, really Save Our Souls. I grabbed the computer and quickly searched Google to prove my point, she really did not believe me. Google duly provided the answer at which point she said, oh, I thought you said save arseholes... I thought that would be a novel way of calling Thunderbirds into action, now, where are these arseholes who need saving?
The point though was a fair one, as you get tired your brain interprets what you think you hear and finds the best match. I normally start out ok but in a social context as the beer flows it gets more difficult to follow the theme. It also helps if you have been part of the story. I find it easier to chat about something if I know where the conversation is going. I also find it easier to chat to pensioners as they tend to speak more slowly and clearly.
I know I must be getting indoctrinated because I now dream in Dutch, the thing is I suppose all of the words are in there somewhere and my subconscious must be able to put them together in the right order without worrying about whether it is right or not.
The most important words I have learnt are: Ik ben en engelsman, ik spreek en beetje Nederlands, kunt u spreek langzaam alstublieft. I am not sure about the spelling of those but in essence it is: I am an Englishman, I speak a little Dutch, can you speak slowly please? It also gives me more time to think and understand. I also know how to get someone to repeat themselves in two different ways!
I think I will be learning until the day I pass on, I suppose that is not just limited to languages!
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